Tuesday, February 19, 2008

One for the Raj

Today is neutral Tuesday. I want to say some notorious things which might sound that I am supporting Raj and his bull shit about chucking North Indians out of Mumbai. Unfortunately, as a Secular Sardarji Economist Prime Minister, I have a brain unlike many politicians from UP and Bihar (oops...will the secular media please ignore this) and it is always useful to see the other side of the things.

Bashing people belonging to any religion or region happens when they do something which hurt other people.

In Mumbai, some folks eat a lot of pan, they sell a lot of pan, they spit a lot of pan, they do not have good manners, the taxi and rickshaw drivers try to fleece you when you hire them form the airport, some people stink when they stand next to you in the train, they do not speak Hindi in the Mumbaiya style and finally if they go on a holiday they return after 6 months. Now this is not good enough reason for bashing anyone.

Just imagine if the bhaiya did not eat pan and was decent sort of a guy who smiled and helped all, could Raj have whipped up the emotions of his stupid party men and women?

Same thing about Muslims, it is there aggressive wearing of the religion on the sleeve which makes them unpopular.

Have I provoked you?

Monday, February 18, 2008

Right to Intelligent Parents

Right to education bill, which I plan to table in the parliament, guarantees free and compulsory education to every child aged between 6 and 14. This is nice. Arjun and I are pleased with this. Along with this we are also planning a right to intelligent parents’ bill. This is necessary as it has been statistically proved that stupid parents do not send their kids to school. The child needs intelligent parents and it is a human right.

Survival is the key. And survival is what we cook.

Monday, February 18, 2008 is a key day in the history of Pakistan. As the Pakistani go to vote, Former ISI chief says that there is a likelihood of an Iran type revolution in Pakistan. I really have no problems with revolutions in Pakistan if US continues to keep the Pakistani nuclear arsenal under their control.

Kis kis ko safe karo ge?

Sunday, February 17, 2008

My New Office

As a Sardarji Economist Prime Minister I need to get a better set of wheels. Better then Amabanis. Here is what I am getting in 3 months.

Hawai Dal No 1

Times Group is a Bhaiyya

Sahu Jain family own the Times Group. They are of Agrawal Jain community. Sahu Jains hail from a small town of Najibabad, Bijnor district, Uttar Pradesh, India.

Rajbhai....would you like to say any thing about their Bhaiya status?

Thursday, February 14, 2008


As a Sardarji Economist Prime Minister I am surprised at what I got handed for inspiration this morning. Quotes from Chanakya, the Indian politician, strategist and writer, 350 BC.

"A person should not be too honest. Straight trees are cut first and Honest people are victimised first."

"Even if a snake is not poisonous, it should pretend to be venomous."

"The biggest guru-mantra is: Never share your secrets with anybody. ! It will destroy you."

"There is some self-interest behind every friendship. There is no Friendship without self-interests. This is a bitter truth."

"Before you start some work, always ask yourself three questions - Why am I doing it, What the results might be and Will I be successful. Only when you think deeply and find satisfactory answers to these questions, go ahead."

"As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it."

"Once you start a working on something, don't be afraid of failure and don't abandon it. People who work sincerely are the happiest."

"The fragrance of flowers spreads only in the direction of the wind. But the goodness of a person spreads in all direction."

"A man is great by deeds, not by birth."

"Treat your kid like a darling for the first five years. For the next five years, scold them.
By the time they turn sixteen, treat them like a friend. Your grown up children are your best friends."

"Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person."

"Education is the best friend. An educated person is respected everywhere. Education beats the beauty and the youth."

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Arunachal Pradesh

Did you know that CPI(M) is the only political party in the country which has not come out strongly stating that Arunachal Pradesh is an integral part of India.

I hope the main stream secular media picks up on this and goes after these chaps. Amusingly, the main stream English media in India seems to be run by the communist and Raj remains in focus. Also, Modi does not remain in focus unless there is an opportunity to bash him.

China? No No...it is a part of the USSR!

Monday, February 11, 2008

2 most important things you notice

This is a picture on rediff.com

I as a Sardarji Economist Prime Minister noticed the Muslims first. A Muslim from North India beating up a Marathi Manoos at Dadar. One has to be a very very secular Marathi Manoos to not get pissed off about this. Then I noticed the nice colors on the MNS flag.

What do you folks notice on this picture?

By the way, Does Raj look like a Ghatti?

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Mahindra United World College of India

Mahindra United World College of India is a college. I was there. I told the intelligentsia present that Brand India has been shaped by young Indians who have faced global competition without asking for a level-playing field, long before Indian business was willing to do so.

I was just kidding. Level playing field!! We give the kids a mountainous terrain to climb from day ONE. A CAT like examination to get into Kindergarten to combating reservation to get into higher education, we give you mountains and ravines each step of the way. Your 10 standard examination rivals walking the plank on a pirate ship. Your 12 standard examination is a verdict on yourself which may drive your self esteem in either direction.

Honestly, we will be the only country in the world where we test vocabulary, numerical and analytical ability to give admissions in Kindergarten.

We are on a level playing field. We can write any entrance exam!

Saturday, February 09, 2008

The bold and the cold

Mubaikar's dislike for warm cloths makes them bold enough to face the cold without the woolens on! Mumbai reached temperatures of 8 dec C which is very close to its previous record of 7.4 dec C.

I pissed of the Chinese leadership by visiting Arunachal and asserting that it is a part of India. While I know that most of our ignorant middle class nerdy have no idea where Arunachal Prasesh is, the Chinese know it's exact location.

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Am I being sacked?

Gullf news, which seems to know more about my life then NDTV is reporting that I am going to be sacked by soon by Soniaji. This is all because I follow all her instructions and am very obedient which at times makes me look like a foll. I may become Pranab Mukherjee, Rahul baba or Murli Deora.

But honestly, this hogwash. For some more time I cannot be anything but the Sardarji Economist Prime Minister.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Sri Rajput Karni Sena

Sri Rajput Karni Sena, is another Sena. Sena and Sena everywhere. This sena wants to ban Jodhaa Akbar. They say it is an inaccurate interpretation of history. You mean to say that Jodhaa Akbar is like this blog? Pura Bullshit story eh?

But can Ashutosh put a disclaimer that this a work of fiction at the start of the movie? "This is history as per my interpretation which became fiction after I realized I would loose a couple of millions with my version of reality"

I am likely to visit Iran this year. I am also going to get into a bit of trouble with the US for this.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Abhishek - 32

Abhishek has spent most of his 32 years on this planet in Mumbai. A pakka Mumbai ka bhaiya. Raj should call him up and wish him Happy Birthday in Marathi. I am sure he will appreciate it. He is a classic example of a Bambaiya. Bongla Mom, Bhaiya papa, lives in Juhu, a gujju area and still can speak Marathi. Magic eh?

I do not have the courage to increase the fuel prices! I will pray some more and look at CPI for guidance...

Monday, February 04, 2008

Maharashtra Navnirman Sena (MNS)

I checked and rechecked on Wikipedia. MNS is not a political party in India. It must be a terrorist organization based in Shivaji Park. Oops, just found it, it is a part of the 793 Registered Unrecognized Parties. Very important in out type of country eh?

Have look at who is actually running the country...other than Soniaji I mean...

Nice colors eh...bit too much on the saffron side....need to change this image.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Raj, Bihar and Mumbai

I am glad to report to Soniaji this Sunday that Raj Thackeray and his team will indulge in UP/Bihar bashing in Mumbai. We will get votes in UP and Mumbai, both. The Marathi Manus does not need these policies to be successful.

The Marathi Manus is more smarter than Raj...

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Raj Thackeray and Paswan demand arrests

Paswan demanded the arrest of Raj Thackeray for hurting the sentiments of people from Bihar and Uttar Pradesh. Raj was pissed off about observance of 'Chhath Puja' and celebration of Uttar Bharatiya Diwas in Maharashtra by people from north India.

Raj Thackeray demanded the arrest of Paswan for dividing people by demanding reservation for Dalit Muslims and Dalit Christians.

Modi demanded the arrest of both Paswan and Thackeray by declaring He declared that such divisional politics is not good for the Hindu community. He said "Every Indian has a right on Gujarat, no matter where they were born. Gujarat has the responsibility to change the fate of India"

And the Prime Minister of Gujarat is...

Government to block Wikipedia

If Maya memsahib can suspend 3 officials for praising Rahul baba can we block Wikipedia?

Here I have "copy pasted" the nasty, rude and totally inaccurate description of Rahul baba's image on wikipedia. I strongly condemn this culture where anybody can write anything. Responsibility bhi koi chee hai!

Rahul baba ki koi girlfriend, bullfriend nahi hai. Sab photoshop ki trick hai!

Form Wikipedia as on 01 Feb 2008

Rahul Gandhi's legal affairs team has taken a number of heavy-handed measures to prevent damage to his image. For example, when Newsweek alleged in late 2006 that he had not completed his degrees at Harvard and Cambridge or kept his job at the Monitor Group, they were slapped with a legal notice, following which they hastily retracted or qualified their earlier statements.[22].

Far more serious allegations of rape, apparently originating from the web forums of Hindu revolutionary group Hindu Unity and spreading through sympathetic vectors in the blogosphere and other web discussion communities, surfaced in early 2007. The host of the web board, ezboard, was served a legal notice as well[23], and immediately shut down Hindu Unity's web board, for what it deemed as "Terms of Use" violations.[24][25]

On the subject of the Nehru-Gandhi family he noted:

You know that when my family decides to do anything, it does it. Be it the freedom struggle, the division of Pakistan or taking India to the 21st century,[26]